


Looping, oh the fun!

by Loner_Kid



Category: Naruto
Genre: Friendship, Gen, Humor, Idols, Mystery, Originally Posted on FanFiction.Net, Singing, Song Lyrics, Time Loop, Time Travel, anime reference
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-09-13
Updated: 2016-02-04
Packaged: 2018-04-20 15:57:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 14
Words: 17,039
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4793570
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Loner_Kid/pseuds/Loner_Kid
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Naruto and Sasuke are looping, and they're bored. They've already destroyed Konoha 15 times, taken over the world 15 times, gathered a harem 20 times and failed each time, joined ANBU 78 times, created their own villages over 30 times... What should they do now? Updates every Friday</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy!

Two people were lying on a futon, gazing lazily at the sky with half-lidded eyes.

"So, what should we do this time around?"

"Gather a harem?"

"Won't work. Remember what happened last time with Anko?"

"Damn it."

"How 'bout destroy Konoha?"

"Done that 15 times already."

"Take over the world?"

"Successfully 15 times, unsuccessfully 9 times. I'm bored with it."

"Join ANBU?"

"Done that 78 times already."

"Send a Death Note **(1)** to Oro-chan and laugh at his reactions?"

"Not fun enough."

"Turn Oro-chan into a kid?"

"Do you even know how to make APTX4869 **(2)**?"

"Damn. I should've asked Gin during that loop."

"How about a zombie apocalypse **(3)**?"

"How?"

"Mass genjutsu."

"You have enough chakra for that?"

"Damn."

"What about mess with people's mind?"

"We've been doing that every time."

"Damn it."

"Create our own village?"

" _Another_ one? We already have Ramen Village, Tomato Village, Snake Village, Fox Village, Hot and Sexy Village, Toad Village..."

"Alright alright, that's enough. Hell knows how you manage to remember all the names."

"Cuz I'm a genius."

"No you're not, _I_ am."

"You're not."

"I am."

"You're not."

"I am."

"..."

"...talk about immature."

"Hey you started!"

"And you followed the trend."

"Teme."

"Dobe."

"...ANYWAY, back onto the topic. What should we do this time around?"

"...something we haven't done before?"

"Obviously...what haven't we done before?"

"...write "Yaoi Paradise" and become popular?"

"I _dare_ you."

"Never mind then. But becoming popular is a good idea."

"Done that before, as ANBU, as Hokage, as Hunter-nin's, as 'The Next Sannin,' as missing-nin's..."

"But not as celebrities."

"Hm...that's a good idea. So you want to become a movie star?"

"I'm thinking more on the vocal side."

"Singer? You know I can't sing."

"That's your opinion."

"...are you complimenting me?"

"Hm? Did you say something?"

"You suck at imitating Kakashi."

"I know, you don't have to say it you know." Sniff. "You've wounded me."

"Sasuke, you are acting OOC."

"And you are breaking the fourth wall."

"It's not called breaking if the wall never existed."

"True that. We did live on the other side of the wall sometimes during some loops." Pause. "But not in this loop, therefore you're breaking the fourth wall."

"Anyway, say that we're gonna become singers. The question remains. _How_?"

"What do you mean how? It's easy. Sing a song. Perform it to the world. Become popular. Done."

"You know how to sing!?"

"You'd be surprised." That damn smirk again.

"And how do we perform? Where's the music? Who would play the instruments?"

"Use your brain dobe. One word. Shadow Clone."

"...that's 2 words."

"Blame the author for missing this error."

"You're breaking the fourth wall Sasuke."

"And we've used computers enough times to know how to create music with simple softwares."

"It's not called 'simple' if it requires advanced computer programming...AND DON'T IGNORE ME!"

"Don't worry, leave it to the great Uchiha-sama. After all, I've been friends with Lucifer for over 4 years before he returned to Ente Isla **(4)**."

"Fine then, I'll leave that to you. Now, how do we perform? ...AND I SAID DON'T IGNORE ME!"

"Live? Or computer-generated? There're many ways. What we should worry about is what songs to sing."

"I'm not turning into a girl...AND STOP IGNORING ME!"

"I didn't say that. We know enough good male songs to avoid the female songs...for a while."

"SO YOU _WERE_ THINKING OF MAKING ME SING THE FEMALE PART! AND I SAID STOP IGNORING ME!"

"Well, our first song has to be attention-grabbing enough to leave a big impression. What songs do you suggest?"

"Loituma Girl?"

"Didn't you say you don't want a female song? Besides, you can sing that fast? Because I can't."

"Evil series?"

"Won't leave an impression big enough without the video."

"A Clingy Boy Sticking for 15 Years?"

"That...might actually work! Alright, we'll do that."

"Good... HEY YOU MADE ME FORGET! DON'T IGNORE ME!"

"And see you guys next chapter!"

"AND STOP BREAKING THE FOURTH WALL!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (1)Death Note: whoever's name written in it will die, from the anime "Death Note"
> 
> (2)APTX4869: a pill that can turn one into a kid, from "Detective Conan" aka "Case Closed"
> 
> (3)zombie apocalypse: I'm sure you all know what this is, since this has shown in multiple movies and anime. Basically people turn into zombies, and those that're bitten by zombies will turn into zombies too. The only way to defeat a zombie is by smashing its head. I took this from the anime "High School of the Dead"
> 
> (4)Lucifer & Ente Isla: After Demon Lord Satan failed to conquer Ente Isla, he escaped to an alternate universe-modern Tokyo, Japan. Powerless and poor, he and one of his generals Alciel decided to stay low and get a job in order to stay alive, while finding a way to replenish their magic so they can return to Ente Isla and conquer it. Lucifer is one of his generals who was 'killed' by Hero Emilia. Unknowing to them, Lucifer also traveled to Tokyo after them, hoping to kill Satan in his vulnerable state and become the new Demon Lord. He was later defeated by Satan and lived with them ever since. Somehow, he's quite good at computers (especially hacking and programming).


	2. Changing the Timeline

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Naruto and Sasuke are looping, and they're bored. They've already destroyed Konoha 15 times, taken over the world 15 times, gathered a harem 20 times and failed each time, joined ANBU 78 times, created their own villages over 30 times... What should they do now?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy!

"Class is over! Remember, tomorrow is the graduation exam! Remember to practice the three basic jutsus! And don't be late!"

Iruka stormed out of the noisy classroom. Tomorrow is the exam, and unbeknownst to the students, he was actually the most nervous one. Graduating means sending them off onto the battlefield, which is not a safe place to be. Numerous genins have failed to live past their first C rank. Iruka knew many of his students doesn't need his worrying, like Uchiha Sasuke for example, but some do, like Haruno Sakura, who's book-smart but terrible at Taijutsu. She can pass the exam, Iruka's sure about that, but her fangirl personality may lead her to her doom.

The student who worried him the most, however, was Uzumaki Naruto, the Kyuubi host. His taijutsu skills were barely average, genjutsu skills were non-existent, knowledge about the ninja world was below average, and ninjutsu skills were average, which was only due to the fact that he could produce a solid transformation and a proficient kawarimi. All these poor marks earned him the 'deadlast' title in the class.

Unlike the other students, Naruto had failed the graduation exam two times already (because he stupidly thought that he can pass it when he's only three years into the academy and being the 'deadlast'). Both were due to the fact that he couldn't perform a workable clone. This year, Iruka has mentioned the words "chakra control" more often than usual, hoping Naruto can get the hint and practice controlling his massive chakra. Telling Naruto in a more straightforward manner won't work on him, because he never listens. To him, pranks were always a number one priority on his list of things-to-do (unbelievably that did earn him fantastic stealth).

If Naruto failed the exam this time, then he would lose his chance to become a ninja forever. Iruka couldn't help but worry about his favorite student's fate.

Walking around the corner, Iruka quickly twisted out of the way before bumping into the person.

"I'm so sorry! Are you al-"

"Iruka-sensei?"

Iruka looked up. Standing in front of him with a wide, familiar smile on his face was Uzumaki Naruto, the one causing him the headache that has been forming.

"Naruto? What are you doing here near the teacher's lounge?"

"I want to ask you something, Iruka sensei." Naruto whispered, "do you know what jutsu we will need to perform tomorrow, for the exam?"

"Naruto! I can't tell you that!" Iruka jumped back, eyes widening.

"Eh~? Not even a hint?"

"No means no. It's against the rules."

"So if there're no rules, does that mean you will tell me?" Naruto smirked in a foxy manner.

"Urgh-"

Damn, who knew Naruto can be quite sneaky?

"Fine then, I'll go ask Mizuki sensei then." Naruto sighed dramatically. "And here I was thinking my favorite sensei can provide me help when everyone else just shunned me away."

Hearing that made Iruka frown sorrowfully. "I'm sorry Naruto, but as your teacher I can't help you cheat. I'm sure Mizuki sensei will say that too."

"Who knows? Maybe Mizuki sensei will help me, since my passing the exam means I will no longer be in his class, which I'm sure will make him all happy and giddily seeing how much he hates me."

If Iruka was surprised that Naruto knew Mizuki hated him, he didn't show.

"Anyway, good luck then. Be sure to practice your clone jutsu more, that's what you're poorest at." Iruka said, hoping Naruto would get the hint. He wasn't expecting an approval, but he did.

"Thanks for the advice, Iruka sensei. I knew it, my katra control is terrible. Well, see you tomorrow!"

Iruka watched Naruto skip away with a confused expression. Did Naruto just listened to his lecture and...and...agreed to it?

He seriously needed a drink right now.

* * *

"I'm home!"

Naruto shouted as he opened the door with a loud 'bang'.

"When did my compound become your home?" Sasuke grunted, fingers flying across the keyboard of a modified, more advanced computer.

"Since day one." Naruto glanced at the pile of...well...junk next to Sasuke. "What are those for?"

"These are gonna help us perform."

"Those  _junks_?"

"You'll be surprised at what they can create." Sasuke said, eyes not leaving the monitor screen. "Learned that from Sharaku  **(1)**. Quite an useful quirk, that is, though odd it may be."

"'The Prince of Darkness'?"

"Yes, that Sharaku. Remember that loop where I helped him destroy the world?"

"And killed me in the process?  _Of course_  I remember it."

"Not my fault! He's the one who did it. Besides, all boys would choose a girl over a boy."

"So if you have to choose between Sakura and I, you would choose her?"

"Obviously, since you and I are immortal in a sense. If I killed you, I'd just see you in our next loop again. So no big deal."

"You're evil!"

"Thanks for the compliment."

"Anyway, I gotta go." Naruto said as he opened Sasuke's wardrobe, ignoring the raven's protests, and took out a shinobi black shirt and trouser.

"What are you doing?"

"Changing the timeline a little. Failing the graduation exam 100 times can cause one brain trauma, you know." Naruto changed quickly and attached his weapon pouch to his leg.

"Try avoiding troubles."

"Troubles usually find me, mother."

"Then kick it away like Kubinashi's head  **(2)**."

"Got it, mother!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (1) Sharaku: He's the main character in "The Three-Eyed One" by Osamu Tezuka, who's known to be the "Godfather of Anime." Sharaku's the last descendant of the 'Three-Eyed Ones', and in order to stop him from showing his true, evil side, his 'father' covered his third eye with a X-shaped bandage. Whenever the bandage is peeled off (mostly by using oil), he will start his plans to 'take over the world' aka destroy everything he sees. He has an odd tendency to use materials from the trash to build technologies that can help him take over the world.
> 
> (2) Kubinashi's head: Kubinashi is a youkai who doesn't have a neck, so his head floats around. In some scenes other youkai's would kick his head around lol. He's from the anime "Nurarihyon no Mago."


	3. The Act

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Naruto and Sasuke are looping, and they're bored. They've already destroyed Konoha 15 times, taken over the world 15 times, gathered a harem 20 times and failed each time, joined ANBU 78 times, created their own villages over 30 times... What should they do now?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy!

Sarutobi wasn't as good as the the Forth Hokage when it came to seals, but he knew enough to create seals that can protect his house and alert him when there're intruders. Therefore, it was unquestionably shocking when he returned home one night to find the Forbidden Scroll stolen.

Immediately, he thought about alerting his ANBU to gather all the jounin and chunin to perform a search, but a foreign presence in the room tingled his senses. He quickly threw a kunai at the spot. As the kunai landed in the wall, a figure stumbled out of the shadow with a yelp.

Blond hair, black shirt and pants, and an expression of fear and panic, which was quite unusual to see on the normally hyperactive blond's face.

"Naruto? What are you doing in my house, with  _that_  scroll?" Sarutobi demanded. He couldn't let down his guard yet because it's possible that Naruto was just an imposer.

"J-jiji..." Naruto stuttered, cerulean eyes looking downcast, tears on the verge of falling. His hands were quivering as he loosened his grip on the scroll. "I-I'm sorry, I know I p-probably shouldn't do this b-but...I'm sorry...I didn't mean to, b-but I re-ally wanna graduate...and he t-told me to wait b-but he wasn't there and I d-didn't know what to d-do so I came b-back b-but then you came and I don't wanna get in trouble but-"

"Naruto! It's alright! Calm down." Sarutobi placed a soothing hand on the boy's trembling form. "I can't understand if you start rambling."

"I-I'm sorry, jiji." Naruto wiped his sleeve across his eyes. "I-I didn't mean to. I'm sorry. I know something's wrong, b-but I just can't help it."

"Naruto, why don't you start from the beginning?"

"W-well..." Naruto fidgeted, eyes darting around the room. It was clear that he was debating whether to tell the truth. "I...I...I stopped by Mizuki-sensei after class today...and...asked him if he can tell me some ways I can practice my katra control. B-because Iruka-sensei told me that I failed bunshin no jutsu because my katra control is horrible...so I thought maybe Mizuki-sensei can help me with it. I-I don't wanna fail the exam  _again_  because of the jutsu, so I aught to pass it this time. And Mizuki-sensei told me that..."

Sarutobi waited patiently, but Naruto didn't go on, so he urged, "what did he tell you, Naruto? Don't worry, you can tell jiji anything."

Naruto sniffed. "He told me that...the reason why I can never do the bunshin...is that..." he took an intake of breath and closed his eyes. "I have the Kyuubi sealed inside of me!"

Sarutobi stilled. Did that man really-

"And because the demon is made of tons of katra, my katra coil is very big, and it is very hard to control. But the bunshin jutsu need very good katra control, so I will never be able to do it. T-then he told me there is a way to pass the exam. He said that I don't necessarily need to do the bunshin jutsu to pass, just any jutsu that creates a clone works."

Sarutobi was so engaged in Naruto's confession that he didn't notice how although Naruto couldn't pronounce "chakra" correctly, he had said the harder word "necessarily" correctly.

"And he said that there's a big scroll in your house that contained a bunshin jutsu that can help me pass the test, because I can do it easily with my big katra coil. I just need to borrow the scroll and bring it to the clearing we agreed on, then he'd help me learn the jutsu, then I can return it when I'm done. I brought the scroll there, and waited, but Mizuki-sensei didn't show up, so I tried learning the jutsu myself, and I did it in about 10 attempts. But Mizuki-sensei still didn't come, so I learned some other jutsu in there... Then I came across some really... _really_  nasty ones, and I thought that maybe I'm not supposed to touch this scroll-"

 _You realized too late, Naruto._ Sarutobi sighed. This boy was too naive. One day it'll bring him dire consequences.

"-so I thought maybe Mizuki-sensei isn't coming, and maybe I should return the scroll. So I came here. I was 'bout to return it but then you came in. But then I can't stop thinking what if I'm in trouble for borrowing this scroll, since you looked so angry...and..."

Sarutobi took a moment to compose himself.

"So...am I in trouble?" Naruto asked tentatively.

Instead of answering Naruto, Sarutobi called upon the ANBUs who were hiding in the shadows (eavesdropping) and ordered them to gather all the jounin and chunin to capture Mizuki.

"Jiji? Is Mizuki-sensei in trouble?"

"Naruto...what you have stolen is called the Forbidden Scroll. It contained all the jutsu the Hokage(s) deemed extremely dangerous and thus forbidden to be learned." Sarutobi explained as Naruto widened his eyes. "Thus, yes, Mizuki  _and you_  are both in trouble. But!" He said quickly before the panicking boy can utter a thing. "We will investigate into this matter, and most likely you will free from charges because you were just following a superior's order."

Naruto shifted uncomfortably on the rock hard ground. "I'm sorry." He murmured as he handed the scroll to the Sandaime.

Sarutobi smiled and took the scroll from Naruto. The scroll was covered in dirt and scratches, showing just how hard Naruto had been practicing.

"So...what will happen to Mizuki-sensei?"

"He will be placed in the T&I department so we can investigate this matter further."

"Oh...and jiji?"

"Yes?"

"Can you explain to me...about the Kyuubi?" Naruto looked hesitant. "Is that the reason why everyone hates me?"

"Naruto. You have to understand that they don't hate you." Sarutobi placed his hands on Naruto's shoulders. Through the thin fabric, he froze when he realized just how thin Naruto was.  _I have to remember to tell Ichiraku to make some changes to their recipe. No wonder Naruto is so short._

"You're lying! They hate me! Everyone hates me! You think I don't what they say behind my back do you?! I know more than you think I do!" Naruto yelled, face reddening as he thought back to the hateful words directed to him. "Demon brat! Kyuubi brat! Kick me out if I dared to enter a restaurant! Charge me twice as much if I attempt to buy  _anything_! Tell their children to hate me, stay away from me! Tell me then! If they don't hate me then why would they do that!?"

Sarutobi was stunned at the raw emotions the boy was showing. Naruto had never shown anyone how he truly felt. He may seem like someone who can never hold a secret, but he's actually more than capable to hide his true emotions. He never cries in front of people; he never let anyone know how he really felt. He always hides behind his goggles, his knucklehead persona. This was the first time Sarutobi had ever seen Naruto break down.

"Naruto..."

"I know they hate me! Everyone hate me! I bet even my hero the Fourth Hokage hates me! That must be why he chose to seal the Kyuubi inside of me! Maybe even my parents hate me, if I have any! Maybe even you  _hate_  me-"

Naruto was cut off with a tight embrace. He blinked, tears streaming down his cheeks.

"Naruto, I'm sorry for never telling you this. I wanted to protect you. I thought this is the best for you. That's why I never told you anything. I'm sorry for being so selfish, for not realizing how much pain you're in." Sarutobi patted the boy's back as he decided to spill the beans. "Naruto, the reason why the Fourth Hokage chose you to seal the Kyuubi in is...that you're his son."

Surprised to not hear any reaction from Naruto, Sarutobi leaned back, but was stopped when thin arms wrapped around his back.

"Jiji, thanks for trying to comfort me, even if it's a lie."

"Naruto it's not a lie!" Sarutobi broke himself from the hug and stared into the boy's eyes. "Your father is the Fourth Hokage. I never told you this because your father has many enemies, and if they found out that you're his son, you will be in danger."

"Then he must hates me if he sealed the Kyuubi inside of me!"

"He doesn't!" Sarutobi was getting tired of this conversation. Who knew the boy was so pessimistic? "Trust me, your father doesn't want to do that either. You weren't his option, but what parents would want their child to have a demon sealed inside of him or her? Leaving with either do nothing and let the demon destroy the village, or seal the demon in his own child, your father chose the latter. What kind of Hokage is he if he can't sacrifice his son for the village? A Hokage's job is to ensure the safety of the village. The village always comes first, no matter what."

"Then I don't want to become the Hokage," Naruto pouted.

Sarutobi was shocked to say the least.

"If I have a son, I will never do this to him. I won't let anyone live through the life I'd lived. Even if it cost me the entire village." Naruto muttered. "So I guess I'm not fit to be a Hokage eh?"

"Naruto..."

"I know how much it hurts to have people hate you for something you have no control of. It's not my fault to jail the Kyuubi! Why can't the villagers see that? I'm sorry jiji but I'm not kind enough to let anyone else live my life. Does that mean I'm a bad person?"

"Naruto...you're not a bad person." Sarutobi ruffled the boy's hair. "A person can't be truly bad if he made the choice to protect somebody, even if the choice require many sacrifices. You may not fit a Hokage's role, but you will be a good ninja. A good comrade. A good father."

"Jiji...thank you, for telling me everything." Naruto smiled. "Now that I know the villagers are idiots, my A.T. field  **(1)**  can finally work to its full scale."

_AT field?_

"What do you mean?"

"After all," Naruto smiled. "The villagers must be idiots if they can't tell the difference between a prison and a prisoner."

"So true, so true." Sarutobi laughed, ruffling the boy's hair. Naruto seemed to be smarter than he appeared to be. Sarutobi mentally reminded himself that appearance can be fake. "Well, it's getting very late and you have an exam tomorrow. Why don't you go home and get some rest? We can continue this conversation tomorrow after your exam is over."

"Alright jiji! Thanks again for everything!" Naruto was gone before Sarutobi could murmur a reply. He was once again marveled by the boy's amazing speed.  _No wonder he could escape all the ANBU chasing after him during his pranks._

Minutes later, his room was crowded with ninjas.

Two ANBUs, a cat and wolf masked, were holding a struggling Mizuki down.

"Hokage-sama! What's the meaning of this!" Mizuki cried, panic seeping through his voice.

Sarutobi narrowed his eyes.

"That's what we're going to talk about right now."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (1) A.T. Field: came from EVA, stands for "Absolute Terror Field." It's a barrier that both Angels and Evangelions can generate to protect themselves.


	4. Kakashi's Suspicion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Naruto and Sasuke are looping, and they're bored. They've already destroyed Konoha 15 times, taken over the world 15 times, gathered a harem 20 times and failed each time, joined ANBU 78 times, created their own villages over 30 times... What should they do now?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy!

"Hokage-sama! What's the meaning of this!" Mizuki cried, an expression of fear and panic climbing onto his face as he saw Chakra-Suppressing Seals being slapped onto him. He was on his way home when he was ambushed by dozens of ANBU and jounins. Before he could react, he has been paralyzed, tied, and shunshin-ed to the Hokage's office.

"Mizuki, you're under charges for attempting to use Uzumaki Naruto to steal the Forbidden Scroll. Aside from that, you're sentenced to death no matter the results of the charges because you've revealed Naruto's jinchuuriki status to him." Sarutobi said. Ignoring Mizuki's cry of protests, he ushered the ANBUs to take him to the T&I department.

"Inoichi, can you help take a look into his mind?"

"Of course, Hokage-sama." Inoichi shunshin-ed away, leaving a room full of perplexed ninjas.

"Hokage-sama, did Mizuki really tell Naruto to steal the Forbidden Scroll?" A chunin baring a scar across his nose stood out.

Iruka.

One of the few people who actually cared for Naruto.

Sarutobi sighed. "Yes. Moments before Mizuki was brought in, Naruto had just left my office. Apparently, Mizuki told Naruto to steal the scroll and wait for him at a certain area, but he never showed up. So after digging through the scroll for a while, Naruto _finally_  realized that something's not right, so he came to return the scroll."

Most people sweat-dropped at the emphasis. How _slow_  is the boy?

"Wait! What do you mean by 'digging through' the scroll?" Iruka pointed out.

Sarutobi smiled. "It seemed that Naruto had managed to learn some jutsus before he came across some ' _really nasty ones_.'"

"W-what jutsus did he learn?" All the ninjas were listening attentively. After all, they're curious of what the deadlast managed to learn from the _Forbidden_  Scroll.

"Well, we'll leave that to Kakashi to find out."

All eyes were directed to a masked jounin with his headband covering his left eye.

Kakashi, however, was suspicious.

"Hokage-sama, are you sure that Naruto...is telling truth?"

Immediately a heated glare was directed to him.

"I trust Naruto, Kakashi. I trust him with my life. The raw emotions he'd shown to me could not be an act. It's the first time I've seen him break down." Sarutobi closed his eyes, remembering Naruto's tears-stained face and cerulean eyes that were swimming with emotions.

"I trust Uzumaki Naruto with my life," he repeated.

Kakashi retorted, "I'm not saying that Naruto was lying, Hokage-sama, but don't you find it strange that Mizuki left Naruto in the clearing all by himself? If he's planning to take the scroll for himself, then why didn't he show up? When we found him, he was calmly walking back home with a plate of dango in his hand. It just seemed to me that something isn't right."

"Everything will be revealed tomorrow after T&I department is done interrogating Mizuki." Sarutobi waved his hand in dismissal. "Please return home and get a good night rest. Everyone's dismissed." Everyone shunshin-Ed away except his personal ANBUs. "Fox, Snake, I want you to watch over Naruto. Make sure he doesn't do anything stupid after tonight's revelation."

"Yes sir!"

* * *

"And because Jiji saw my vulnerable side, he decided to tell me the whole truth. So now if I, _we_ , accidentally spilled some beans, the result wouldn't be that dire, since now we have a reason to know these information." Naruto concluded. Currently, he's back in the Uchiha Compound, talking excessively while Sasuke was busy typing incomprehensible codes into the modified computer.

"Good work. But what about Mizuki? He's actually 'innocent' this time, so what would you do when they found out the truth? That everything you've said was a lie?"

"Com'on Sasuke, did you forget who we are?" Naruto looked devastated.

"I'm not senile yet, unlike you. I know I'm Sasuke."

"And I know that I'm Menma," Naruto joked. "What I mean is did you forget that we're 'loopers'? We are immortal! We are powerful! We are godlike beings! We can go to alternate universes and learn their techniques! Something no one else can do, except you and I! You think I can't take care of a simple little thing like a memory problem?"

"Then how're you gonna do it?" Sasuke quickly cut off Naruto's rant before it gets too long.

"I'm not telling yeah, since you called me 'senile.'"

"Hmph. I'll find out sooner or later anyway."

"Bleh, We'll see."


	5. Ibiki's Keeping Silence

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Naruto and Sasuke are looping, and they're bored. They've already destroyed Konoha 15 times, taken over the world 15 times, gathered a harem 20 times and failed each time, joined ANBU 78 times, created their own villages over 30 times... What should they do now?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy!

Instead of taking Naruto to his office, Sarutobi went straight to the T&I Department. He was smiling as he tuned out Naruto's blabbering of his exam. Inside, however, he was in turmoil. The result of yesterday's interrogation was startling.

_Flashback_

_"What do you mean it never happened?!" Sarutobi bellowed, standing in front of Inoichi, Ibiki, and an unconscious Mizuki tied to a chair._

_"I've looked into his mind, and read his memories. What Uzumaki Naruto had claimed...had never happened. Mizuki has no memory of ever telling Naruto to steal the Forbidden Scroll." Inoichi said._

_"Are you saying that this man is innocent?"_

_"No. Though he has no connection to the Scroll incident, I found out that he's actually a spy for Orochimaru. In his memories, it's shown that he'd been secretly sending information to Orochimaru, especially information about the jinchuriki." Inoichi explained. "Thankfully, by reading his memories, I'd learned the locations of where he'd seek out of Konoha and of one of Orochimaru's hideout."_

_Sarutobi was silent, arguing with himself. One half of him wanted to be suspicious of Naruto, while the other half of him wanted to continue believing in Naruto. After all, he saw Naruto as his grandson. He'd seen Naruto grow up, and he knew the type of person Naruto was. Naruto would never steal the scroll and learn its jutsu, then lie and frame another person. Right?_

_Flashback Ends_

Sarutobi stole a glance at the boy chattering next to him. The more he observed Naruto, the harder he could convince himself to be suspicious of Naruto. It just seemed so impossible, so out of the blues. Besides, the raw emotions Naruto had shown the other day couldn't be fake. Sarutobi wasn't the Hokage for nothing. He'd lived through wars, interrogated and tortured prisoners; he may not be as good as Ibiki, but he could tell if a person was lying or not. And when Naruto broke down, Sarutobi knew it wasn't an act. It couldn't be.

"Jiji, where are we going?" Naruto's voice broke him out of his reverie.

"We will be carrying our discussion elsewhere," Sarutobi answered calmly. "There's someone I want you to meet."

"Oh," Naruto uttered, and gone back to chattering.

Soon they arrived. The location of the T&I Department was hidden under many seals and genjutsu. Sarutobi quickly disabled them and led Naruto inside. After walking through a long, narrow, and dark corridor, they arrived in front of Mizuki's interrogation room.

"Hokage-sama." Inoichi and Ibiki greeted when they saw Sarutobi walking in with Naruto in tow. Mizuki was still tied onto the chair, unconscious.

"Jiji? Where are we? Why is Mizuki-sensei tied up?" Naruto said in confusion.

"Naruto." Sarutobi finally made his choice. "Drop the act. You're not Naruto aren't you?" He targeted Naruto with a sharp glare and a little killer intent.

"What do you mean, jiji?" Naruto said with an awkward smile. "Of course I'm Naruto. Uzumaki Naruto! Have you finally gone senile that you can't recognize me anymore?"

Sarutobi observed Naruto with analyzing eyes.  _He's behaving as if he really is Naruto. There's not one sign of nervousness and anxiety of being found out. Not once did his eyes widen. Could I be wrong?_

"Yesterday, we had performed a jutsu on Mizuki that can look into a person's memories. And we found out that Mizuki had never asked you to steal the scroll. Everything you'd claimed had never happened according to Mizuki's memories." Sarutobi decided a confrontation would be the best. Talking in circles won't lead him anywhere.

"W-what are you talking about?" Naruto stuttered in a disbelieving tone.

"Therefore, we have come to one solution. Either you were lying, or you aren't whom you claimed to be." Sarutobi paused as he noticed Naruto's eyes finally widening. "You can either tell us the truth, or we can torture it out of you. Just letting you know, Inoichi and Ibiki are a master in psychological and physical torture, respectively. When they're done, the victims often are unable to function correctly for the rest of their life."

All three man bored their eyes into the young boy, watching his body language with speculative eyes.

Naruto bowed his head down, bangs casting shadows over his eyes.

"R-really...jiji. I thought you would understand." His clenched fists were shaking as he spoke in a trembling voice. "You'd really believe Mizuki over me? You've watched me grow up! You're like a grandpa to me, jiji! You would really believe an incompetent teacher, and not to mention who's a  _spy_ , over  _me_!?"

"The Yamanka clan's mind-reading jutsu allows the user to enter the mindscape of the victim, and gives the ability to see all the memories of the person. Only a Yamanaka can counter the jutsu, and Mizuki clearly isn't a Yamanaka."

"That's IT!? That's what it takes to convince you that I'M the one who's at fault!?" Naruto looked up, glaring at the three men. Sarutobi's stony expression almost faltered when he saw tears glistening in Naruto's eyes. "You didn't think that  _maybe_  a Yamanaka had turned traitor and had helped Mizuki hide his memories? You distrust me that much that the first possibility you thought of is 'Naruto is not who he is'?! Or perhaps you've never trusted me in the first place!"

"That's not-"

"Shut up!  **Just shut up!** " Naruto's voice suddenly turned deeper and raspy as he began emitting a red aura. His narrowed blue eyes turned into a crimson red, slits forming in the middle. His whisker marks have also deepened, making them more feral-looking.

All three men tensed, their hands moving closer to their weapon pouch, ready to attack if necessary.

" **I knew it. Everything you've said that night is a lie. You never liked me. To you, I'm just the Kyuubi container, aren't I?** "

"Naruto, stop it! Don't let your emotions take over your senses!" Sarutobi shouted as he moved closer to the boy. The more unstable Naruto's emotions were, the easier it was for the Kyuubi to take over.

Though it was only a little, the red foul aura had retreated back into Naruto's body. " **Why? Are you afraid that I might unleash the Kyuubi on you all?** " Naruto chuckled maniacally. " **Of course you would be. You're the Hokage; you're supposed to protect the village from any threats! Yet, a 12 years old boy is the first person you suspect in this situation. Why? Because to you I'm just the container of Kyuubi! And thus I'm not a part of the village; I'm not under your protection!** "

"Stop this, Naruto!" Sarutobi reached Naruto and gripped his shoulders tightly, staring at him earnestly in the eyes. "I've told you last night! You're like a grandson to me! I never viewed you as merely the Kyuubi container!"

"And  _now_  you believed I'm actually Naruto?" The changes on Naruto disappeared, but the maniacal grin didn't vanish. "It took the  _Kyuubi's power_  to convince you that I'm Naruto?! How ironic!"

For the first time, Inoichi stepped forward. "If you insist that you're Naruto, then you wouldn't mind if we take a look into your mind wouldn't you?" He spoke. Sarutobi snapped his head towards him, sending a silent message to him:  _Are you sure? You know what you might encounter if you enter his mind don't you?_

Inoichi shrugged:  _What else can we do in this situation?_

Both men looked back to Naruto, and were surprised to find a nasty grin plastered on his face.

"Sure, go ahead. But be careful, the fuzzball isn't happy right now. Don't say I didn't warn you."

"Fuzzball... Do you mean the Kyuubi?" Sarutobi widened his eyes. "You can talk to it?"

" _Him._  And yes, I met him for the first time last night when I fell asleep. It turned out that he can see everything that's going on through my eyes and hear everything I'd heard. And now he isn't happy, because he doesn't like to be blamed for something he'd never done."

"Well, let's get this over with then."

As Inoichi began doing hand seals for his jutsu, Sarutobi watched from the side, frowning over Naruto's words.

If...Naruto happened to be innocent...then he'll have a lot to apologize for. But that chance was very slim...because...how can memories be faked?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Why didn't Ibiki say anything? Because Sarutobi took the spotlight from him! Because Naruto talked too much! And thus there's no place for him to talk :)  
> Yeah, this chapter name is meant to be a joke :)


	6. Omake - sort of

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Naruto and Sasuke are looping, and they're bored. They've already destroyed Konoha 15 times, taken over the world 15 times, gathered a harem 20 times and failed each time, joined ANBU 78 times, created their own villages over 30 times... What should they do now?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy!

Morning, 6:00 AM

Fingers tapping rapidly on two keyboards. Multiple wires spread out on the ground. Next to him sat two guitar-shaped objects with cables connecting them to the computer. After a while, Sasuke stopped, lifting his hand wearily and pinching the bridge of his nose. There were dark rings under his eyes, which were threatening to snap shut. He had been staring at the computer for more than 5 hours without blinking. Exhaustion was slowly getting into him, but the outcome was worth it.

Sasuke stretched his joints, and stood up, arching his back. He grimaced when he heard loud snapping sounds.  _I kept on forgetting that I'm now in my 12 years old body, not my muscular older self who's used to this type of living style._ _I really should stop torturing this body._ _Otherwise I'll be the first Uchiha to die of sleep deprivation. Naruto'd laugh his ass off._

After getting a drink of water to sooth his burning throat, he went to the restroom to do his morning routine. After wiping his face dry of water, Sasuke hovered his hands over certain objects as memories resurfaced in his mind. A shudder ran through him as he remembered the  _old days_. His mother would always remind him to apply facial lotion, saying how it could make his skin creamy and soft. And before he leave the house, he must apply sunscreen to every part of his body that'd expose in sunlight. That way, he wouldn't look like his father when his grew up, whose skin was tanned and wrinkled.

But as Sasuke grew older, especially after killing Orochimaru, he had stopped doing all those things because they reminded him of a certain snake's pale and smooth skin. The idea of having something in common with the snake disgusted him.

Sasuke dropped his hands and hung the towel. Since he's mother had been long dead, he wouldn't get in trouble for not listening to her. It's not like she'd rise from the dead and reprimand him.

Quickly dressing up in his usual attire, Sasuke looked back at Naruto who was still snoring loudly on a separate futon before leaving the compound to buy breakfast. Walking past Ichiraku brought up a memory of Sasuke's working there with a cheery, brown-haired girl. In some loops, Naruto had married Ayame. While in some other loops, Sasuke had married her. Being with her wasn't so bad actually. At first, Sasuke thought a civilian girl was no fun. But the more time he spent with her, the more he started to fall for her. He noticed how she doesn't treat him like he's some prince character. That alone made her unique enough for Sasuke to be interested in her.

Being with Ayame was fun, but that didn't stop Sasuke and Naruto from dating different girls every loop. You can all them jerks, sure, but imagine dating the same girl for over 100 loops! It's just like playing gal games. No one would want to play the same girl over and over again. The more you played, the more predictable they were. They'd no longer be a challenge. That made playing the game boring. To Sasuke and Naruto, their life was a game. If they die, they'd start over again in a new loop. They have infinite chances to do things over and over again, and try new methods and unlock hidden missions or plots. They wanted challenges to make their 'game' fun; thus, trying to win different girls' hearts was a great plan.

After about ten minutes, Sasuke stood in front of a small convenience shop. In his first life, he had never visited this shop, because its shabby look was too outdated for the great 'Uchiha-sama.' It wasn't until many loops later does Sasuke realize that this was one of the only shops in Konoha that doesn't refuse Naruto's entrance, and the shop owner was one of the few who treats him like a normal boy. Since then, Sasuke had been visiting this shop for all his necessities in every loop. To say Konoha's shop owners were surprised was a great understatement.

Entering the shop, Sasuke quickly spotted his favorites: rice balls with bonita filling and tomato juice. Sasuke took them, then went and took three boxes of cup of noodles. Knowing Naruto, he'd most likely think of some excuse to tell the Hokage so he could live in Sasuke's house without raising suspicion. And since in this loop they're planning to become singers, which would require many cooperation and plannings between the two of them, the probability of Naruto's doing so was very high.

Carrying everything to the cashier, Sasuke placed them down and tapped his finger against the glass counter lightly to wake the sleeping man. The man lifted his head groggily, and jolted awake when he saw who the customer was. Sasuke tried his best to stifle his laughter. Seeing a person in his unattended shop with the possibility of shoplifting didn't surprise him, but Sasuke's presence did? That's why Sasuke loved this man. He's just too funny.

"G-good morning, Uchiha-san," he quickly calculated the price, looking surprised when he saw three full boxes of ramen, and told Sasuke the total. "Would you like a newspaper?"

"Sure." In almost every loop, the man would offer him a newspaper. Sasuke had accepted every time. Maybe in his next loop he should refuse it? Just to see the changes it would bring?

"Here you go. Have a nice day-" his head hit the counter and soft snoring was heard before Sasuke had even stepped past the threshold.

Carrying three boxes of ramen would attract many attention. Not to say the subject was the 'great Uchiha Sasuke.' Many civilians have offered to help Sasuke carry the boxes, but Sasuke refused them all. He needed this weight training.

After a long, painful walk, Sasuke finally arrived home.

 _Home sweet home._ He thought.  _Man, I wonder how long it'd take to train my body to be as strong as my older self's?_

Placing the food on the table, Sasuke carried three boxes and went to Naruto who's currently spreading drools on his pillow. Sasuke sighed and resisted the urge to dump the boxes onto Naruto's face. Instead, he set them down carefully next to Naruto.

Three minutes later he was wolfing down rice balls while reading the newspaper. Having not eaten dinner last night, Sasuke was hungry beyond words at the moment. That's why he'd bought twice the usual amount of rice balls.

_Politics...economic...sports? Boring..._

Sasuke flipped through the newspaper rapidly with only a few glances on each pages.

Suddenly, his movement siezed as his gaze settled down on a certain bold headline on a page.

"Holy shit! This is the perfect opportunity!" He couldn't help but exclaim as he finished reading the page, excitement and glee gleaming in his eyes.

In the room next door, Naruto murmured, "express your madness elsewhere, Sasuke..." Moments later, he was woken up by a frantic Sasuke who's urging him to move quickly so they won't be late for the graduation exam.

 _Guess I'll have to tell him after the exam is over..._  Sasuke thought as he and Naruto raced through the village.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Nothing really happened in this chapter, so I named it "Omake." But something important DID happen (near the end), so this was also named as a chapter, instead of just 'Omake' without a chapter label.
> 
> I hope my version of Sasuke isn't too ooc...?
> 
> In case you guys didn't realize, the content of this chapter happened BEFORE the graduation exam, which was before the whole interrogation took place.


	7. Memories

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Naruto and Sasuke are looping, and they're bored. They've already destroyed Konoha 15 times, taken over the world 15 times, gathered a harem 20 times and failed each time, joined ANBU 78 times, created their own villages over 30 times... What should they do now?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy!

Inoichi found himself in a sewer. Foul odor filled up his nostrils. He gagged, retching sound echoing in the tunnel. Shaking his sandals free of water, Inoichi began walking along the wall. Soon he reached several doors. Pushing the first one open, Inoichi found himself watching the memories like a movie.

He saw Naruto grow up, was kicked out of the orphanage, was beaten up, and was the victim to many other horrible acts, which convinced Inoichi that he must report this to the Hokage when the jutsu is over.

It continued for a while until one scene caught his eyes.

_Around 9 years old, Naruto was yet again bullied by shop owners. Immediately after kicking Naruto out, he began treating his next customer, Uchiha Sasuke, with smiles and acting as if nothing had happened._

_Sasuke, surprisingly, went to Naruto's defense. He questioned the shop owner's attitude towards Naruto, and even threatened to never visit that shop again if the treatment continued._

_Later, Naruto and Sasuke walked home together, chatting animatedly together. After finding out about Naruto's horrible life, Sasuke began growing sympathetic to the boy. He realized how much he had that Naruto never had._

_After that incident, they became friends. Naruto, not wanting to ruin Sasuke's reputation, acted as if they aren't friends in public. Sasuke did the same because he's afraid his fangirls will become jealous and harm Naruto if they saw him getting so close to Sasuke. Thus, they agreed to act like enemies in public, but friends in secret._

_Together they trained, played, and even pulled pranks (with Sasuke's buying the necessities and doing the preparations)._

To say he was surprised was an understatement. Inoichi was shocked beyond words! To think that everyone, including the Hokage, had been fooled by two 9 years old's acts! He wondered how they managed to pull it off for 3 years without anyone's finding out.

Few scenes later, finally he reached the night of the scroll incident.

To his surprise, the incident happened just like how Naruto had described.

_"Naruto? What are you doing here near the teacher's lounge?"_

_"I want to ask you something, Iruka sensei." Naruto whispered, "do you know what jutsu we will need to perform tomorrow, for the exam?"_

_"Naruto! I can't tell you that!" Iruka jumped back, eyes widening._

_"Eh~? Not even a hint?"_

_"No means no. It's against the rules."_

_"So if there're no rules, does that mean you will tell me?" Naruto smirked in a foxy manner._

_"Urgh-"_

_Damn, who knew Naruto can be quite sneaky?_

_"Fine then, I'll go ask Mizuki sensei then." Naruto sighed dramatically. "And here I was thinking my favorite sensei can provide me help when everyone else just shunned me away."_

_Hearing that made Iruka frown sorrowfully. "I'm sorry Naruto, but as your teacher I can't help you cheat. I'm sure Mizuki sensei will say that too."_

_"Who knows? Maybe Mizuki sensei will help me, since my passing the exam means I will no longer be in his class, which I'm sure will make him all happy and giddily seeing how much he hates me."_

As Naruto had said, after hearing the request from Naruto, Mizuki immediately took the chance and questioned.

_"Do you want to know why you can't perform a bunshin correctly?"_

_Naruto widened his eyes. "Of course! Tell me, Mizuki-sensei!"_

_"The truth is, on the night of the Kyuubi attack, the Fourth Hokage didn't kill it, because it's impossible to kill a demon made of pure chakra. So he chose an alternative method," Mizuki said as Naruto listened with unblinking eyes. "He sealed the Kyuubi inside a newborn. You."_

_"Me?" Naruto croaked out, index finger pointing uncertainly at himself._

_"Yes. And because the Kyuubi's massive chakra is hard to control, it made you unable to make a bunshin, which requires great chakra control."_

_"D-does that mean, I will never be able to pass the graduation exam?"_

_"No."_

_Hope glinted in Naruto's eyes._

_"There is a way; however, it is a little dangerous. Are you willing to try?"_

_"Of course! I'll do anything to pass the exam!"_

_"Good!" Mizuki smirked. "There's actually another bunshin jutsu you can learn which can also help you pass the exam. However, the jutsu scroll was kept in Hokage-sama's house. What you have to do, is to borrow it, and bring it here, then I'll help you with the jutsu. After you learned the jutsu, you can then put it back, and no one will know."_

_"That's easy! It's just getting a scroll from jiji's house! I can do it any time!" Naruto cheered._

_Mizuki shook his head. "It's not that easy. Hokage-sama's house is protected by many seals. Some will alert him if an intruder enters his house, because they can detect chakra. But don't worry, I will teach you a way to get past them."_

Alarm was ringing in Inoichi's ears. Something's not right. There's no way, even if he's a spy, Mizuki could know how to get past The Third's seals. Not to say what kind of seals they were.

_"Chakra Suppression Technique can help you suppress your chakra to the point that it's impossible to be detected. Here's the handseals..."_

_Mizuki then taught Naruto how to perform the technique. Then later that day, after Naruto went home and dressed himself in an all-black attire, he went straight to the Hokage's house. He first performed the technique and suppressed his chakra completely. **(HIS chakra, not the Kyuubi's chakra. It's chakra can't be detected if Naruto don't use it.)** Then Naruto quickly slipped into the chimney when he spotted the opportunity (when the guards weren't looking)._

_Then, as Naruto had stated, he went to the meeting place but Mizuki weren't there. So after a while, he went back to the house..._

Inoichi exited the boy's mind.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter isn't well-written. Sorry guys, but I just don't feel motivated. Please bear with me.


	8. Ibiki is very observant

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Naruto and Sasuke are looping, and they're bored. They've already destroyed Konoha 15 times, taken over the world 15 times, gathered a harem 20 times and failed each time, joined ANBU 78 times, created their own villages over 30 times... What should they do now?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ibiki finally talks!  
> Enjoy!

"How was it?"

Inoichi was subjected to Sarutobi's question as soon as he returned to reality.

"The boy didn't lie. Everything he had claimed was true."

Sarutobi stilled. He had expected Inoichi to return to tell him that Naruto was lying, though he found it hard to believe. After all, how could memories be faked? But now Inoichi's telling him that everything Naruto had claimed was proven true by his memories? How could it be!? How could two people memories contradict each other!?

"I felt dizzy..."

Naruto's voice brought him out of his thoughts. Sarutobi glanced at the clock and sighed. "You can go home now Naruto. Sorry for doubting your words...and all the trouble I've brought to you."

"..." Naruto was silent, as if he's debating whether or not he should forgive his old man. "It's...alright. As long as you believed me... I'm just hurt that you believed a spy over me, jiji."

Sarutobi looked down guiltily.

"Your memories may not be faked."

A voice made all three of them jump a feet. Three heads turned simultaneously to Mizuki's direction, to Mizuki...

...and to the person standing behind him: Ibiki.

"But  _you_  can be faked."

Naruto forced himself to stare into those cold, tunnel-like eyes.

"Ibiki!" Sarutobi barked.

"I'm not a Yamanaka, so I won't say much about your memories..." Ibiki began, his voice deep and rough. "However, you're actions made me suspicious. Or rather, everything about you made me suspicious. I've been observing you since you entered this room. And I found that everything you do, your reactions and replies, were all trying to lure us to check your memories."

Naruto looked calm, but inside he was in turmoil. Even with hundreds of loops he had been through, he still couldn't trick Ibiki. Seems like age doesn't equal experience.

"Ibiki, you will stop right now!"

Ibiki ignored Sarutobi and continued. "You kept on making the Hokage feel guilty for suspecting you. You mentioned how he believed a spy over you, how memories doesn't mean anything, and how a Yamanaka may have turned traitor and helped Mizuki. Then, to make the Hokage even more guilty and worried, you 'lose' control of the Kyuubi's chakra, which I'm sure you have planned ahead of time, though I have no idea how you manage to have such great control of it on your first try. You continued your little drama and talked bad about yourself, reminding the Hokage of your identity as the Kyuubi host and making him even more guilty and saddened of his actions.

"Seeing the Hokage was finally moved by your little act, you stopped releasing the Kyuubi's chakra. Because Hokage-sama was so guilty, he was urged to prove your innocence. Thus, when Inoichi asked to look into your mind, the Hokage didn't stop him. And then you smirked, because everything went exactly according to your plan. Am I correct?"

Silence followed Ibiki's little speech. Inoichi was looking thoughtful. Sarutobi was looking furious. And Naruto...

...he didn't say anything. Partly because he didn't know what to say, but mostly because he's worried that what he say next would be used against him again.

"I don't know how you manage to fool Inoichi, a master in psychological torture, with your memories, but I do know that you're definitely not who you claimed to be. You better be careful in your actions, and whatever you're planning. Because I will be watching you. Have a nice day."

Naruto turned his head almost mechanically towards Sarutobi. After getting no response, Naruto bolted out of the room with an expression of a mix of disappointment, anger, and sadness.

The door slammed shut...then it was silence...

"Well..." Inoichi coughed, and began explaining what he had seen in Naruto's mind.

When he finished, Sarutobi sighed and rubbed his beard. "So that's why my ANBU reported to have seen Naruto going to Sasuke's house. I never thought they could be friends. After all, one's the deadlast while the other is the top of the class. Finally, one matter solved."

"And not to say, the  _boys'_  are a genius in acting..." Inoichi remarked, reminding Sarutobi of how Naruto and Sasuke had managed to hide their friendship from the entire village for all these years.

"Which could be not true."

"Be quiet, Ibiki!" Sarutobi ordered, tightening his jaws in anger. "You have said enough to the boy. Even if he had planned all this, it doesn't mean he's guilty."

"Hokage-sama, you're acting exactly how the boy wanted you to act. As I have said, he  _wanted_  you to feel guilty, just so you would stop suspecting him and help prove his innocence. It's all a trap." Volume rising, Ibiki continued in anger. Angry at the Third for not understanding how much of a danger the boy was.

"And as _I_  have said," Sarutobi retorted, glaring at the taller man. "The boy may have planned all this, but that doesn't mean he's guilty. He could've wanted us to read his mind, just so his memories can prove his innocence. Have you never thought of that?"

"But-"

"No buts. I don't want to hear you talking about Naruto as if he's a criminal ever again. Do you understand me?"

Sarutobi's voice was powerful and commanding, even Ibiki couldn't say 'no' hearing that tone.

"I will keep my watch on Naruto. After all, he plays an important role in this strange event. However, I won't believe that his memories were faked-"

"'Won't believe' or 'don't want to believe'?"

Sarutobi swirled around so fast his hat almost flew off. He quickly slammed it back down onto his head, and growled. "Are you mocking  _me_?!"

"No sir. Sorry sir."

Sarutobi retracted his KI when he was satisfied with Ibiki's reply.

"If anything, it has to be Mizuki's memories that are faked. After all, like Naruto had said, what kind of Hokage, and jiji, would I be if I believed a spy's memories over one of my own's?" Ibiki shook his head in remorse, while Inoichi continued to look undecided of whose memories he should believe.

Sarutobi ignored Ibiki's action and continued, "I will have my ANBU looking after Naruto, while you two keep your eyes on Mizuki. Try to get as much out of him as you can. Also, send some ANBU to check those locations you saw in his memories. Lastly, Inoichi, I want you to keep an eye on your clan. Report to me as soon as you find any members suspicious. Don't try to handle them yourself. If they can create the seemingly impossible fake memories, who knows what else they can do."

"Yes sir."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Can anyone guess how come Naruto's memories contradict with Mizuki's memories? :))) And how to create the 'false memories'?  
> (Answer revealed in the next chapter)


	9. Thanks to Harry Potter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Naruto and Sasuke are looping, and they're bored. They've already destroyed Konoha 15 times, taken over the world 15 times, gathered a harem 20 times and failed each time, joined ANBU 78 times, created their own villages over 30 times... What should they do now?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy!

Sasuke was rewarded with a flying hug when he opened the door. Clutching onto him like a koala was none other than Uzumaki Naruto.

"Geroff me, Naruto!"

"Sasuke~~~ Help me! He found out!" Big fat tears rolled down Naruto's cheeks, soaking up Sasuke's shirt.

"Who, when, what, where, how?" Five words, fired like bullets.

"Ibiki, a while ago, you know what, T&I department, I DON'T KNOW HOW WAHHHH!"

Sasuke sighed. This was the kind of things you have to deal with if you're stuck with Uzumaki Naruto for hundreds of loops. And even after so long, he's still a huge pain in the ass.

"Eat a cup of ramen and calm down."

Immediately, the huge weight on his chest was gone. In less than a second, loud slurping sound was heard coming from the kitchen.

"So, now that you've calmed down...hopefully, tell me what had happened."

Letting out a loud burping sound, Naruto set the cup onto the table, and began telling what he had experienced.

"Wait!" Sasuke interrupted. "Fake memories? How do you do that?"

Naruto stared at him as if he had grown a second head. "You're seriously asking me this? Magic, brooms, snake, long stick, owls? Ring any bells?"

"You don't mean-" Sasuke widened his eyes, and chuckled. "I should've known. You used Occlumency right  **(1)**."

It wasn't a question; it was a statement. Because Sasuke was 99.99 percent sure it was the right answer.

"And a False Memory Charm. It worked like a charm!" Naruto exclaimed. "All I did was use Occlumency to hide my real memories, then use the False Memory Charm to plant these false memories in my head, which I can erase whenever I want."

"You gotta thank Snape for that." Sasuke smirked, remembering the 'good' times.

"No way in hell!" Naruto gagged. "He's the worst teacher ever! It was Hermione who taught me it! Successfully!"

"Hermione? She knows Occlumency?"

"Yeah, in some loops."

"And how many loops did it take you to learn Occlumency?"

"..." Naruto said something like 'mimble wimble.'

"Sorry, I can't hear you."

Naruto glared heatedly at the smirk on Sasuke's face. "About...thirty-six loops..."

"Genius," Sasuke gave him a huge thumb-up. "You're a genius, Naruto."

Anyone with a brain could hear the sarcasm literally dripping in his voice.

And unlike how most people believed, Uzumaki Naruto does have a brain.

"Did you just call me an idiot!?"

"When did I say that?" Innocent big eyes were blinking.

"...you look creepy."

Sasuke's shoulder sagged.

"Whatever, continue your story please."

"Oh well, and so..."

Thirty minutes later, with many exaggeration and wild hand gestures, Naruto finally finished his story.

"So basically, you lured them into reading your mind so you can prove your innocence, but Ibiki saw through your plan." Sasuke rolled his eyes. "You could've said that in three sentences, not including the exaggerations."

"Why aren't you worried!? They found out! Do you remember what happened last time we were found out? We were placed into a cell with chakra-suppression seals attached onto us!"

"Which we escaped using Apparition  **(2)**  seconds later and restarted the loop."

"And last last time we were captured and attached onto those cold surgery tables to be experimented on!"

"Which we, yet again, escaped using Apparition seconds later and restarted the loop."

"And last last last-"

"Did Ibiki see you using the False Memory Charm?" Sasuke interrupted.

Naruto blinked. "Of course not."

"Did Ibiki see you using Occlumency?"

Naruto frowned. "You don't  _use_  Occlumency. Once you've learned it, it's always in you, protecting your mind. It's just like learning to walk. You don't  _use_  it; it's in you once you've learned it."

"So did Ibiki have any evidence to prove you guilty?"

"No..."

"There you go. So what're you so worried about?"

Now that Sasuke has said that...the situation doesn't seemed that bad...

Naruto nodded slowly. "Yeah, what am I so worried about? If they found out, we can just use Apparition and escape. Or we can just pull the trigger  **(!)**  and start our new loop."

Seeing Naruto had finally gotten a hold of himself, Sasuke smiled.

"Anyway, I have something important I need to show you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (1) Occlumency: It's from Harry Potter. Snape had tried to teach Harry Occlumency to block Voldemort from his mind, but it didn't work. I mean, of course, since Snape is the worst teacher ever.
> 
> (2) Apparition: Also from Harry Potter. It basically means teleporting, which doesn't require chakra, cuz it doesn't come from the Naruto universe.
> 
> (!) Trigger: To start a new loop, something must triggers it. Death is the most common trigger for looping fics.


	10. Daughter of Evil

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Naruto and Sasuke are looping, and they're bored. They've already destroyed Konoha 15 times, taken over the world 15 times, gathered a harem 20 times and failed each time, joined ANBU 78 times, created their own villages over 30 times... What should they do now?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I don't ow the songs! The lyrics used in this chapter were translated by lordxwillie, cover sang by Ketsuban (link in my Fanfiction profile).  
> Warning: Some mention of adult things, which are T-rated so they should be fine.  
> Enjoy!

"Look at this."

Sasuke took out the specific page in the newspaper and spread it out on the table.

"It's the Literature page. It always post stories or poems that people wrote." Naruto frowned. "What does it have to do with us?"

"Use your brain Naruto. I know you have one, though it's pea-sized." Sasuke continued quickly before Naruto can retort. "Look. Even if our songs were great, our singing skills were great, and we looked super duper hot... Who would care?"

"Why wouldn't they care?"

"Obviously, we aren't going to perform in our real identities. So why would people listen to songs of two singers, whom they have never seen or heard off?"

"...that makes sense."

"Think of Muse (μ's) for example. Their first performance only has about ten audience members (including us). They have passed flyers around the school, and spreaded the word, so how come only ten people showed up? It's because they weren't well-known and had no fans at that time. If A-RISE had held a concert there, the auditorium would be completely filled. It wasn't until many performances later, after gathering more members and performing in front of different schools, on the street, in Love Live, were they popular enough to defeat A-RISE in Love Live's final round  **(1)**."

Naruto stared at him with a strange expression. "And how come you know about them so well?"

"Well..." Sasuke looked a little embarrassed. "I like their songs...and..."

"And~~?"

"Umm..." Sasuke looked away. "They look cute...and..."

"Don't tell me..." Naruto suddenly gasped. "YOU were the one who sent Ayase-san that love letter! No wonder the handwriting looked familiar. It was  _you_  after all!"  **(In case you don't understand this part, there are explanations at the bottom of this chapter.)**

"It was a  _dare_!" Sasuke argued, blushing furiously.

But Naruto wasn't buying it. "And the darer had dared you to send a  _second_  love letter after your first one was exposed for the entire student body to view?"

"...w-well, anyway, ahem," cough cough, "right now, we are just like Muse after their initial debut. Nobody knows about us, so they wouldn't bother to listen to songs of two strangers, no matter how good the songs may be (just like Muse's first song). And thus, we need to find a way to introduce us to Konoha. We need to slowly gather fans and audiences, so when we finally perform our first song officially, there will be people who actually bothered to listen to it."

"But how do we do that?"

"With this." Sasuke tapped a certain section on the page.

"Poems?" Naruto wonder out loud. "How would that help with anything?"

"Many song lyrics could also be read as poems. Therefore, we'll choose some of the good ones and publish them onto this newspaper. When we have enough fans who love our poems, we can then announce that we're gonna turn those poems into songs. That would interest these fans, and they'd want to know how their favorite poem would sound like as a song. Especially if the songs are going to be sing by the writer of the poems."

"Great idea, Sasuke! I never thought of that!" Naruto exclaimed. "So what poem should we publish first?"

"...this."

* * *

Konoha's Newspaper Publisher was a huge and well-known company. Almost everyone would buy a newspaper everyday, to keep up with the news and important events. Living in a ninja village, information was very important. And that's the reason why this Publisher was so well-known.

-Literature Section-

"What's this shit!?" Head Editor Seito growled, slamming the crumbled paper onto the table. Everyone in the room trembled.

" _Your eyes are so beautiful,_

_just staring at them made me faint._

_Your hair is so shiny,_

_just staring at it made me blind._

_Your lips are so sexy,_

_just staring at it made me drool._

_Your boobs are so big,_

_just staring at it made me cum._

_Your ass is so hot,_

_just staring at it made me HARD!_  They call this poetry!? They dare to call this literature!? This little piece of shit!"

"S-seito-san...please calm down-"

"Calm down!? How can I calm down!" The poor editor retreated back to his corner, regretting to have spoken. "I've been looking through poems after poems all my fucking day, and all I found is shit! I'm done! I'm leaving!"

"Wait! Please, just stay for a while more! We have only one more poem left to look through! It might be good!" Another editor spoke up. Not because he's curious of what the last poem's about, but because he's afraid that all of them would be in trouble if they weren't able to find a good-enough poem to fill in the spot, after the last poem author had retired.

"Fine! After this I'm leaving!" Seito sat down, ripped open the letter, and began reading...

...five minutes later...he's still reading...

All the other editors stared each other in the eyes, confused.

Then all of a sudden, Seito's hands began to shake...then his head...then his whole body... He shook so hard it's hard to believe he wasn't epileptic.

Before the editors could ask for his well being, Seito jumped up and exclaimed. "I found it! This is the one!"

The editors could only stare each other in the eyes, confused.

Oh well, it's not like this was new.

* * *

Sakura was smart, book-smart. One reason why was that she loved to read. Ever since she was little, her mother would make her read the literature section of Konoha's News. According her mother, in order to understand the political and economic sections of the newspaper, she needs to improve her reading skills and vocabulary first.

It was quite fun, actually, to read interesting stories, which were mostly about ninja. But because most of the authors were all civilians, who don't quite understand how the ninja world works, they made it sound very cool and fun. That's why Sakura wanted to become a ninja, because wouldn't anyone want to be cool and have fun?

Reading has become a habit. Now that Sakura's older, she'd still read the Literature section of the newspaper during breakfast.

Today, as usual, Sakura sat down onto the breakfast table and picked up today's newspaper, flipped to the page, and began reading the story she had been keeping up to date with. After reading everything, she skimmed her eyes to the poems section. She was surprised to see her favorite author being replaced by an unknown name.

"A new author? Humph." She was ready to throw down the newspaper, since she's a huge fan of Sakamoto-sensei, and she doesn't believe anyone could write poems better than he could, but the title caught her eyes.

"Daughter of Evil? By Nakamura Tenzoi?" The title was strange. Could the poem about a girl with dark power? Without much expectations, Sakura began reading. Slowly and bored at first...then she got more and more hooked by the poem. She realized, the poem was different from those she usually read. This one was a story.

_There was once upon a time in another place_  
_An evil kingdom who no person dared to face_  
_And the ruler was a girl so mean_  
_A tiny little princess of only age fourteen!_

"A fourteen years old girl is the ruler of a kingdom? How can a girl that young be evil? Could this be an exaggeration to hook the readers in?" Sakura was suspicious, but she continued reading.

_So many furnitures littered her abode_  
_Her loyal servant who's likeness surely showed_  
_Josephine was what her horse was named_  
_All the riches of the world is what she had claimed._

"A servant...that looks like her? Is this foreshadowing something?" Sakura wondered, and kept on reading.

_If you're short on money that's no fearful thing_  
_Just take it from those who you dangle on a string_  
_To those who feel that they want to bring me down_  
_You'll just tidy up my gown._  
_Now, bow to me!_

"What a conceited person! I don't think I'm going to like her..." Sakura frowned. 'Bow to me?' No one would like to be talked to like that. But so far, the girl only sounded mean and arrogant, not evil yet.

_Evil flowers_  
_Steadily bloom_  
_With an array of colourful doom_  
_But the weeds who feel that they want to stay_  
_They'll just die and and feed me the same anyway._

_The princess held a love for a man_  
_Of blue who wasn't very much her fan_  
_But instead he chose his neighbor's girl_  
_Of green who's eyes shone like a pearl._

"I have a bad feeling about this..." An arrogant and jealous girl... Who knows what she'd do to be together with her love.

_The princess knew this and was filled with rage_  
_She called the servant locked in her cage_  
_And said in a soft voice to not be heard_  
_"Make sure the green country is badly stirred."_

"No way!" Sakura exclaimed. "She's destroying an entire country just because she doesn't like that one girl!?"

_Houses of the people were burned to the ground_  
_So many voices would no longer make a sound_  
_The people who had suffered so much pain_  
_Didn't get pity from the one who'd slain._  
_"Oh, it's tea time."_

"S-she...doesn't she care about these people's lives!? They are also human beings! How could she kill them all and sit there like nothing had happened!?" Sakura was filled with rage, but at the same time, she wanted to cry for the death of all those innocents.

_Evil flowers_  
_Steadily bloom_  
_With an array of bloodied doom_  
_Even though the flower is so very refined_  
_The thorns had driven its garden to decline._

_To defeat the princess was no easy task_  
_But the people could no longer wear their mask_  
_Like a flock of birds they were led by_  
_A red lady mercenary into the nigh._

_All the anger that had built up over the years_  
_Now consumed them without any fears_  
_But the army was battered from the green war_  
_Their attacks were not much of a chore._

_Once they fell the countrymen surrounded the court_  
_The servants ran away as time was short_  
_Little woman princess would not pose a fight_  
_And she was finally captured in the night_  
_"You're such a disrespectful man!"_

"Yes! The evil girl would get what she deserved!" Sakura cheered.

_Evil flowers_  
_Steadily bloom_  
_With an array of funest doom_  
_How the paradise that she made for herself_  
_Put this broken doll right back on the wooden shelf._

_There was once upon a time in another place_  
_An evil kingdom who no person dared to face_  
_And the ruler was a girl so mean_  
_A tiny little princess of only age fourteen._

_She was to be punished at three o' clock_  
_When the church bells resounded a tock_  
_The person who was once royalty_  
_Was bored in jail with no loyalty._

"A girl who's only fourteen years old...is going to be killed..." Sakura felt pity for the girl, but another voice in her mind told her that the girl deserved it.

_At the time that eventually came_  
_The church bells to her sounded rather lame_  
_Without looking to faces of the crowd_  
_Said she with eyes in a shroud_  
_"Oh, it's tea time."_

Sakura was angry once again. Why doesn't the girl apologize? Even before she's about to be killed, she still won't regret her actions?

_Evil flowers_  
_Steadily bloom_  
_With an array of colourful doom_  
_Now the people speak of her without a second thought_  
_That daughter of evil had received what she sought._

_TBC_

The poem ended here, surprisingly, with a 'TBC' written at the end.

Does that mean this poem hadn't ended yet? Does that mean there's more to the story?

Sakura smiled so widely her cheeks hurt. It's her first time she liked a poem this much! Even Sakamoto-sensei didn't give her this feeling...this indescribable feeling.

An evil girl, a very very evil girl, fell in love, very conceited, killed everyone, got punished... The story may sound simple and cliche, similar to any other children stories which teach youngsters that evil was bad and good was, well, good. But this simple plot line indeed had captured Sakura's attention. She had never felt so emotional towards a fictional character before.

Usually, when she read about an evil character, she would feel angry about him or her and pity the innocents. But that's it. She would feel angry, then she would continue her day as normal and put the story behind her (so she can fill her mind with thoughts of her beloved Sasuke-kun). But this girl, this evil girl, had made her want to cry, want to scream, and even want to jump into the poem and kill her herself!

Placing the poem down, Sakura finally picked up her cold toast and started chewing on it. She didn't even notice how she was taking large bites, which she normally wouldn't do because it would make her fat. (She had read on a Health magazine that one should always chew a mouthful at least 20 times before swallowing it.) While eating her breakfast, Sakura couldn't help but think back to the poem.

Who will become the next Queen, or King? What will happen to the Blue boy and the servant? The country? Or even the evil girl herself?

She had a feeling that this poem wouldn't leave her mind for days.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (1) Muse (μ's): From the idol anime Love Live: School Idol Project. Muse consists of 9 girls who created this school idol group to save their school from closing due to the decreasing amount of applicants each year. A-RISE is a successful school idol group of UTX high school, which gained many applicants each year due to A-RISE's reputation. Love Live is the ultimate school idol competition featuring the best groups of Japan.
> 
> Indeed, in one certain loop, Sasuke and Naruto were students in Otonokizaka Academy, which was the school the Muse girls were in. Sasuke had a crush on Ayase Alisa so he sent her a love letter anonymously. Ayase was determined to find out the sender, so she exposed the letter to the entire school. Then, Sasuke sent another one, again, anonymously. During the whole time, Naruto was busy with the club he had joined. (They try different things in different loops, to keep themselves entertained, which means they are skillful in many different areas.)
> 
> And that's just a little explanation to help you understand that part.


	11. Nakamura Tenzoi

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Naruto and Sasuke are looping, and they're bored. They've already destroyed Konoha 15 times, taken over the world 15 times, gathered a harem 20 times and failed each time, joined ANBU 78 times, created their own villages over 30 times... What should they do now?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a clarification. I did NOT write the poem Daughter of Evil. It's the English translation of the Japanese lyrics of a Vocaloid song under the same name. It's the first song in a series called Evil series.  
> Enjoy!

The same event had occurred in not just Sakura's household, but also in many other houses.

"This is my first time reading a poem like this! I never thought a poem can also be a story!"

"People nowadays always write about their love, their pain, sadness...etc. It's getting old. Now is the time for more creative poems like this! Nakamura Tenzoi has opened up a new path to poetry!"

"I had never felt so emotional towards a fictional character before! Usually when I read a love/hurt/comfort poem, I would feel a little sad. But never before had a poem left such a heavy imprint in my mind!"

"Now is Nakamura Tenzoi's era!"

"I wonder what will happen next!"

"I want to know more about that servant who looks like her... Is this supposed to be a hint for something...?"

"Same here. Not sure if anyone noticed, but it's the servant who destroyed the Green Country, not the evil girl..."

"I, however, am curious about that Blue boy. What would he do after he found out the cause of his love's death?"

"Wait! Did no one notice the Red lady? I wanted to know more about her..."

"Actually, I'm more curious about the author than the story itself. To be able to write such an amazing poem, the author must not be a beginner. But I had never heard the name Nakamura Tenzoi before."

"Same here. Does anyone know who he/she is?"

"Or maybe 'they'?"

While the readers were in chaos, the creators of the chaos were currently sitting in the Academy, waiting for their team to be announced.

"Team 7, Uzumaki Naruto..." Iruka announced. In the corner of his eyes, he saw Naruto's smiling.

"...Haruno Sakura..."

_Eh? Weird. Both Naruto and Sakura didn't react._

Unbeknownst to him, Naruto had gone through this day too many times to care about it. While Sakura was too engrossed in the poem she had read that morning to care.

_Alright...well, how 'bout this!_

"...and Uchiha Sasuke."

_Something's wrong. All three of them didn't react!_

_Well, at least Ino's acting normal._

Indeed, unlike Sakura, Ino was currently groaning and hiding her face in her arms while Shikamaru was smirking at her from aside.

"Your team sensei will be here after lunch break. Dismissed!"

* * *

Sakura was eating her lunch alone on the stony bench. On her lap was  _Daughter of Evil_ she had cut out from the newspaper.

She read it again and again...

No matter how many times she read it, she'd still want to read it once more. In other words, she's completely captivated by this poem.

Suddenly a figure landed in front of her. Sakura glanced up and met Ino's eyes.

"Ino-pig! What're you doing here?"

"Isn't it obvious, Forehead girl?" Ino smirked and pointed to her team, who was eating on the rooftop. "I saw you eating here all alone, so I came to pity you."

"Oh."

Ino was confused. Why didn't Sakura talk back to her like usual?

"Hey Forehead girl!"

"What?"

"I'm talking to you!"

"I know."

Alright. Something's definitely not right.

That's when Ino noticed the scrap of paper on Sakura's lap.

"What's this?" She grabbed it before Sakura could stop her.

"Give it back! Or I'll kill you!" Sakura roared, her eyes blazing with fire, and ripped the paper off of a stunned Ino's hand.

Ino was even more confused, if possible. "What's the big deal?! It's just a paper! Or is it your love letter to Sasuke-kun!?"

"Are you kidding me?! Big deal? This is a HUGE deal!" Sakura sat down and shook her head as if she's pitying Ino. "Sorry but I'm not interested in Sasuke anymore. You can do anything to him and I wouldn't care," Sakura replied calmly.

Ino was flabbergasted. Sakura, not interested in Sasuke? Had she woken up in an upside-down world!?

"I mean, Sasuke is only good-looking and has good grades. But..." Sakura traced the name Nakamura Tenzoi carefully with her index finger, a blush slowly creeping onto her cheeks. "Tenzoi... _Tenzoi_...is much better. I don't know who he is or what he looks like, but...his poems can make me happy. Because of his poems, I look forward to tomorrow. Because of him, I have a reason to live. Tenzoi's poems taught me that just blushing and heart-pounding isn't true love. True love is what gives me the strength to live to see tomorrow. It is what makes you happy..."

Ino slowly backed away from Sakura. This...is definitely not the Sakura she knew.

Her gaze dropped onto the paper.

And that paper must be the reason.

"Let me read it!" She sat down next to Sakura and took the paper.

Ten minutes later, after many curses and tears, Ino sighed and handed the poem back to Sakura. "I think I know what you're talking about now."

"Finally. Took you long enough." Sakura folded the poem carefully and placed it in her pocket.

"I always thought Sasuke is my true love. But now I realized...that's not true love. No one had ever made me so emotional before. Not anyone, and definitely not Sasuke." Ino wiped away a tear. "He's always so cold, and every time he rejects me, I feel so hurt, so rejected. But Tenzoi... Reading his poem gave me energy. It made me look forward to his next poem. It taught me that I have emotions other than my crazy fangirl-like love towards Sasuke. I cry for the death of all those innocents. I curse the evil wench. I pity the Green Country. I wonder about the Blue boy. I ponder about the mysterious servant that looks like the evil girl..."

"Exactly. I, too, realized, I don't love Sasuke. I love Tenzoi and his poem." Sakura smiled. "Does that mean we're rivals again? Not over Sasuke, but over Tenzoi?"

Ino giggled. "When are we not rivals?"

From afar, Shikamaru and Chouji ate their lunch while staring at the strange sight of the two opposing girls laughing together. This day just got weirder and weirder.


	12. Hachiko

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Naruto and Sasuke are looping, and they're bored. They've already destroyed Konoha 15 times, taken over the world 15 times, gathered a harem 20 times and failed each time, joined ANBU 78 times, created their own villages over 30 times... What should they do now?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy!

Kakashi stood before the classroom door. Mentally preparing himself for the upcoming view of his sensei's son. It's a lie to say he's not nervous. In fact, he's beyond nervous, especially after what Sarutobi had told him last night. Naruto? Suspect? Lie? Acting? Forbidden Scroll? Contradicting memories? Just what had Naruto being involved with?

Taking a deep breath, Kakashi slid open the door, preparing to say 'my first impression of you guys is...I hate you.' Why? Because it's fun! He wondered how the three graduates would react!

"My first impression of you guys is-"

He stopped when he heard sobbing and sniffing.

His gaze dropped onto the pink-haired girl.

 _It's the fangirl_. He remembered.  _Haruno Sakura, one of the two lead fangirls of Uchiha Sasuke._ Did the boy reject her again? But when had his rejection ever made her cry?

"Hachiko continues his daily walk to the same spot in front of the train station to wait for his master, till his final day. That day, he saw Ueno coming out of the station and the two greeted each other. Hachiko is last seen lying on the snow, alone and still."  **(1)**

Naruto finished, his eyes dry of tears. He had read this story too many times to cry about it, but it was different for Sakura. For a girl, especially an animal-loving girl, such a story like this where a puppy died was the best weapon to strike her heart.

"W-why...why does Hachiko have to die!" Sakura sobbed, hiding her face in her hands. Her whole body was shaking. Sasuke was patting her back comfortingly, knowing she'd punch Naruto if he did it. "What did he do wrong? What had he done to you! Why do you have to kill him, Naruto!"

"It was just a story, Sakura-"

"It was not! Hachiko is real and alive, in my heart!" Sakura cried, hands covering the spot where her heart was. "Why do you have to kill him! You made that story up didn't you? So you could change the ending and make him alive! Why don't you!?"

"Sakura, if Hachiko had lived, then what's the whole point of this story? If he had lived, then the feels would be gone." Naruto explained. "The main point of this story is to make the readers see Hachiko's loyalty to his master. If Ueno had returned, though the readers would be happy, but this story won't be as powerful and heart-striking as it is. Imagine it, if this story is a happy ending, I bet you'd forget about it in a few hours. But because this story is a tragedy and had made you so emotional to the point to even cry, you wouldn't forget this story for days, or maybe even weeks."

Sakura wanted to deny him, but found she couldn't. Wasn't it the same with  _Daughter of Evil_? If the girl wasn't so evil to destroy an entire country just because she's pissed, maybe Sakura wouldn't be so emotional after reading the poem and become so captivated with the story. The same goes for this story,  _Chuken Hachiko_  (which means 'Faithful Dog Hachiko'). If Hachiko and Ueno hadn't died, the most she'd do is like the story and forget about it in a few hours. But because Hachiko had died, Sakura wouldn't be able to forget about him. Whenever she sees a dog, she'd be reminded of Hachiko. Whenever she thinks of Hachiko, she'd want to cry. Hachiko would stay in her heart and her life forever, just like _Daughter of Evil_.

"Well..."

All three heads turned to the foreign voice (for Sakura that is), and saw a strange man wearing a mask covering his nose and mouth, and a slanted headband covering his left eye.

"My first impression of you guys is-"

"And why do  _you_  have to be so late?" Sakura's sudden question stopped Kakashi from finishing his sentence. He stared at her in bewilderment.

"W-what?" He spluttered.

"I said why do you have to be so late!?" Sakura cried. She couldn't rebut Naruto, so she could only vent her anger on her jounin sensei who was late for over three hours! If Naruto hadn't decided to tell them a story, then she'd be bored to death!

"I-I-...I'm sorry?"

"No! You're not sorry! If you're sorry then you wouldn't be late for three hours! And because you're late, I have to listen to Naruto's tragic story and cry and make my eyes all red and puffy and ugly! It's all your fault!"

"I-I-I...see you on the roof in five minutes!" Couldn't find anything to say, Kakashi shunshin-ed away.

Naruto and Sasuke exchanged eye contacts. Well, that had never happened in any loops before.

"What're you two waiting for? Let's go!" Sakura yelled at both Naruto and Sasuke and quickly left the room, shutting the door loudly.

"And now she's mad at  _me_." Sasuke glared at Naruto. "It's all your fault. Couldn't you have told her other stories? If you want a character to die so badly, then even Little Red Riding Hood would work."

Naruto deadpanned. "Honestly? She's not a child, Sasuke. She's a pre-teen."

"Well, she is a child to me."

"Yet you still dream about her sometimes." Naruto smirked.

"I dream about my last wife Uchiha Sakura, who died at 74 years old! Not this child-Haruno Sakura!" Sasuke argued, face reddening.

"Yeah yeah, whatever you say."

"Hn."

"And even after hundreds of loops, you still couldn't lose this Uchiha-habit."

"Hn!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (1) Hachiko: This is a true story. There's a movie version of it, but I decided to use the true, original, Japanese story of it. It's about a dog named Hachiko waiting for his master Ueno at the station every day, waiting to greet his master when he steps out of the train after work. But one day Ueno died and did not return, but Hachiko obviously didn't know. So he waited there, and waited, in the cold winter snow. When his family dragged him back home, he escaped and continued to wait there, until the day he died in the snow, alone and cold.
> 
> If you can't wait to read the rest, you should check fanfiction.net for more chapters. I always post it there first.


	13. 'Yaoi'

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Naruto and Sasuke are looping, and they're bored. They've already destroyed Konoha 15 times, taken over the world 15 times, gathered a harem 20 times and failed each time, joined ANBU 78 times, created their own villages over 30 times... What should they do now?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: This chapter has mentions of gays and yaoi. I did not write it to offend anyone, so I hope no one is offended. Also, if you're not comfortable with yaoi, don't worry. It's not real yaoi.  
> Well, Enjoy!

-Konoha, on a sunny day, rooftop-

Three people were boring their eyes into one man, making him sweat with anxiety.

_It's my first time teaching! Please don't make it so hard for me!_

"Ahem...well, how about we introduce ourselves first?" Kakashi suggested, hoping this can break the ice.

"Why don't you go first?" Sakura glared.

Kakashi gulped. The girl looked murderous. Seems like he couldn't use his 'creative' introduction now, for his own safety. "My name is Hatake Kakashi. I like to read. I don't like when my precious books are taken away. My hobby is to read. And my dream is to marry a kind woman and live a good life." _There! Now she would think I'm a smart, artistic man who does not have any association with perverts or hentai and thus she wouldn't get mad at me and possibly end my life before I can find my sperms a safe home!_

Unfortunately, Sakura wasn't paying attention to what he's saying, because her mind was still on poor Hachiko.

"Now's your turn, Pinkie."

Sakura glared at him, and began. "I'm Haruno Sakura. I like Nakamura Tenzoi-" Naruto and Sasuke exchanged a curious glance, but no one saw it. "-Hachiko-" Sakura glared at Naruto, who grinned weakly. "-and the Konoha Times. I don't like the evil girl-" Naruto and Sasuke raised a brow. Could she mean- "-and anything spicy. My hobby is reading. And my dream is to be able to meet Nakamura Tenzoi in person for once."

_Great. A Sasuke-fan no more, but now a Tenzoi-fan? But at least we know that our alias Nakamura Tenzoi had gained one fan._

"That's...unexpected." Kakashi uttered in disbelief. He's pretty sure the profile said the girl was a huge fangirl. How come she didn't blush in the Uchiha's presence? "You're next, Uchiha."

"My name is Uchiha Sasuke and I like Naruto." Three sets of eyes widened. Naruto stared at him in utter disbelief. "I hate the villagers who are mean to Naruto. My hobby is to train with Naruto. And my dream is to be able to protect Naruto's first kiss until I'm ready (because only he's stupid enough to lose it to some stranger)."

Kakashi and Sakura were staring at him as if they were seeing him for the first time...wait. That wasn't a good description. Let's try this: They were staring at him as if he had just turned into a girl... Yeah, that's a better one.

_Kakashi: Nononononoooo I knew I should never take a team! Not only did I get a evil pinkie but I also get a gay boy!_

_Sakura: Sasuke-kun...is gay? ...Well that's none of my business since I have no interest in him anymore. But...Sasuke and Naruto...? *blush*_

_Naruto: What the hell is Sasuke thinking!? Why did he say it as if we are...um... But he never does things without a reason, so he must be planning something. I guess I'll go along with him then._

"Oh don't worry I won't lose my first kiss before you do." Naruto smirked and shared a knowing glance with Sasuke, as if they knew something no one else knows, which confused the other two present. "I guess it's my turn huh? Well, you all know me, I'm Uzumaki Naruto. I like ramen and Sasuke." Yet again, Kakashi and Sakura gaped at them. "I don't like fangirls. My hobby is exploring life. And my dream is to protect Sasuke's kiss until I'm ready."

 _Alright, something must be going on between them_ , thought Sakura and Kakashi.

"Ok! So far for the introductions. Tomorrow we'll start our duties as shinobi. First, we'll be having a survival training."

"Training? We have had enough training in the academy. We don't need more," Sakura wondered out loud.

"This isn't normal training. This time, I'm your opponent. And..." Kakashi smirked. "Of the 27 graduates, only 9 will be chosen to become a genin. The rest will be send back to the academy. This training is a very difficult exam with a failure rate of over 66%!" _TADDA!_

Sakura dropped her jaws, Sasuke and Naruto...looked bored.

"Why aren't you two surprised?" Kakashi voiced his mind.

"Why should we be? I know the exam may be hard, but not to us. If we're fighting you, then we'll win for sure, especially now that there're three of us against one of you," Naruto said.

_Good. It seems that he had caught onto the teamwork aspect of this exam. But where did he gain the rest of his confidence from?_

"Besides, I had been pranking the ANBU since I was born, and I had never failed to outran them!" Naruto smiled. Oh the good memories... "And we all know Sasuke is strong, and Sakura isn't weak either. So why should we be worried?"

"...Good point." Kakashi couldn't help but agree. He had seen with his own eyes how fast Naruto was at escaping after his pranks. "But I'm different from them. You may not know, but I was an ANBU commander before I decided to take my first genin team. So don't think so high of yourself."

Naruto and Sasuke still didn't look surprised. Sakura, however, looked curious at the new information.

"...Anyway, tomorrow you'll have to show your real skills on the training gorund. Bring all the shinobi tools you have." Kakashi stepped away from the railings- "Oh...and I suggest you to skip breakfast, you might throw up." -and shunshin-ed away.

Before anyone could say anything, Sakura spoke up, a little shyly, "n-neh, N-naruto, Sasuke-kun, a-are you two...dating?"

"Pffffttt!" Naruto would've spitted if he was drinking any liquid. "Of course n-"

"Yeah we are," Sasuke lied. Ignoring Naruto's murderous glare, he continued. "Saying the truth, I have always liked him, but to protect my crush from the jealousy of my fangirls, I didn't make my feelings known. But now that we have graduated, and I happened to be on the same team as he is, I can protect him whenever and wherever. So I confessed to him yesterday, and he agreed. You would keep our relationship a secret would you?" Sasuke asked, grabbing a strong hold on the arm that's threatening to punch him.

"O-of course!" Sakura exclaimed.

"Good." Sasuke smiled and shunshin-ed away with Naruto.

Above them lying prone to the rooftop of a higher building, Kakashi almost dropped his book in surprise.

_Great. Just great. One problem (fangirl) solved, now another problem raised. What should I do with your son...sensei?_

* * *

 

In the Uchiha compound, a red-faced Naruto was seen yelling at Sasuke.

"Is embarrassing me that funny to you!? Why do you have to tell them that?! We're not dating and we will never be! So keep your feelings to yourself!"

Sasuke spluttered, "don't tell me you actually believed that!" Naruto's incredulous expression told him the answer. Sasuke sighed. "You idiot. It was a lie for gods' sake!"

"A lie?" Naruto choked out.

"Yeah, I mean, since we are almost 24/7 together, it's hard to explain our relationship without making them suspicious and spilling the beans. So I thought of a way. If we are dating, then we'll have a reason to be together 24/7. If, for example, after we finish a mission, we tell them that the two of us are leaving together. Knowing our relationship, they'd just assume we're off to...snog...or something. They wouldn't suspect us of betraying Konoha and making dangerous jutsus and such."

It took a moment for Naruto to accept Sasuke's reasoning. "Fine. I guess I'll accept that. Especially since Ibiki is now very suspicious of me. If I acted abnormal and stayed with you 24/7 (even if they have seen from my faked memories that we have always been like this), he'd think we're up to something." Suddenly, Naruto slapped his forehead. "That reminds me!"

* * *

 

After Kakashi had left his office, Sarutobi leaned back in his comfortable chair and sighed.

Naruto and Sasuke. What a big surprise.

Just how many surprises is Naruto going to bring him?

Sarutobi eyed his crystal ball with an evil thought running through his mind.

Maybe...he can use it to see what the two are doing? I mean...guy/guy isn't that different from guy/girl...

Sarutobi started snickering madly with a trail of blood running down his nose.

His ANBU all edged away from him slowly... Their Hokage was in creepy pervert mode again...

That night, after dismissing all his ANBU, Sarutobi rubbed his hands together gleefully, and began channeling chakra into the crystal ball.

Just then-

KABOOM!

The exploding tag that was placed underneath the crystal ball ignited and almost burned Sarutobi's beard.

Sarutobi cursed.

"These two little brats knew I was gonna do this!"

Well, too bad. It seemed that Naruto and Sasuke knew him too well.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Haha this chapter, though hilarious to write, took me double the usual amount of time.


	14. Servant of Evil

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Naruto and Sasuke are looping, and they're bored. They've already destroyed Konoha 15 times, taken over the world 15 times, gathered a harem 20 times and failed each time, joined ANBU 78 times, created their own villages over 30 times... What should they do now?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto or the songs. The lyrics used in this chapter were translated and sang by "Enn Sings" on YouTube.  
> Well, Enjoy!

The next morning, Sakura woke up extra early to get the daily Konoha Times. She then took a warm shower and dressed in her normal clothes. When she was ready for breakfast, her parents have already woken up.

Sakura quickly greeted them and sat down on the breakfast table. She took the literature page and gave the rest to her father. This action had already become a daily routine for the Haruno family. Not noticing her parents' curious glance, Sakura quickly found her way to the name 'Nakamura Tenzoi' and began savoring the new poem. As she had thought, today's poem was a continuation of yesterday's _Daughter of Evil_. This one, however, was titled _Servant of Evil_.

_O my Queen, you have me as your faithful servant alone_   
_We were twins, torn apart when our fates should have shone_   
_O my Queen, to shield thee from danger's deadly call_   
_I will sin, I will kill, I will sacrifice my all_

"I knew it! That servant who looks like the evil girl is foreshadowing this! He's her twin!" Sakura exclaimed. However, another question rose in her mind. From these four lines, she could tell that this servant loves his twin sister very much. So would he really allow her to be punished and killed? Would he do nothing to stop it?

_Fourteen years ago we were both born into this hell_   
_Praised and blessed by the people and the church's bell_   
_Being in our family we must play by the rules_   
_Even if we look the same, I am destined as your tool_

_They can swear you their enemy, or curse all they want_   
_They can brandish their swords, and be on the hunt_   
_Never fear, never cry, I will always be near_   
_Let not your smile, my sun, turn into icy tears_

"What a faithful servant... Such an evil girl doesn't deserve his loyalty..."

_O my Queen, you have me as your faithful servant alone_   
_We were twins, torn apart when our fates should have shone_   
_O my Queen, to shield thee from danger's deadly call_   
_I will sin, I will kill, I will sacrifice my all_

_While running errands in a peaceful town nearby_   
_I ran into a pleasant lady with emerald green eyes_   
_Smiling with her face so fair, singing with her voice so bright_   
_I was captivated then, knowing love at first sight_

Sakura suddenly stopped, her hands began to shake. "Please don't tell me..."

_But this love will remain locked deep inside_   
_For the Queen gave orders, "The girl must die"_   
_I will answer her wishes, her mind I will ease_   
_So why, my Lord, do my tears fail to cease?_

"Oh god no... He fell in love with the Green girl... So why! Why does he kill her!? Is the Queen _that_ important to him!? Does his loyalty to the Queen matter more than his love towards the Green girl!?" Sakura didn't even notice her mother's placing her toast in front of her because her eyes were glued onto the words on the page. These magical words seemed to have blocked her from reacting to anything else that was happening.

To be ordered to kill your love, and to know that it's impossible to avoid it. _.._ Sakura doesn't even know how to describe what the boy must be feeling at the moment. Agony, pain, suffer... None of these words was powerful enough to be on par with the servant's feeling.

_O my Queen, you have me as your faithful servant alone_   
_We are twins, like two seeds in the soils of madness sown_   
_"O my Queen, your dessert for today is brioche"_   
_And you smiled, and you smiled, innocent without a flaw_

_People of the country were possessed with fear and rage_   
_Threatening to kill the Queen, to move on to a new age_   
_If this is what they call a retribution for her sins_   
_God's words I will go against, for the life of my twin_

"No!" Sakura seemed to have seen something for she suddenly screamed at the page, scaring her parents and almost making her mother drop a glass of milk. Her eyes continued to wander down the words.

_"Here are my spare clothes, now wear these and run_   
_Don't turn back, don't stop, don't talk to anyone_

"Nononono! Don't!" Sakura yelled, her eyes widening to the point that made her look almost haunted. But she doesn't care. Even if she's on the street filled with bystanders, she wouldn't care how ugly she looked at the moment.

_Don't you worry we look the same in every way_   
_No one would ever notice that you got away"_

"Don't do it! That bitch doesn't deserve your loyalty! She doesn't deserve you dying in her place!" Sakura didn't seemed to hear her parents' angry remark, 'language!'

_O now I am the Queen, and you the escapee_   
_We are twins, like two boats in the stormy sad seas_   
_They say you are a lady of vice and disdain_   
_Then I am evil as well, with the same blood in my veins_

"No... You're not evil..." Tears streamed down Sakura's face, and Sakura let them flow. Maybe crying could help her understand the servant's feeling more? "If you're evil, then I'm evil too. For my dad was a ninja and had killed, and I shared his blood..." Kizashi widened his eyes and moved to tell his daughter that she was wrong, but Sakura wasn't listening.

_Once upon a time in a country far away_   
_Where a lot of crimes were committed every day_   
_My lovely little sister who was fourteen years of age  
_ _Was crowned as the Queen, dancing on history's stage_

_They can swear you their enemy, or curse all they want (Finally, long awaited, the time had come)  
_ _They can brandish their swords, and be on the hunt (The deafening chimes sounded a little bit glum)  
_ _Never fear, never cry, I will always be near (The crowd showed not a sign of sympathy)  
_ _Let not your smile, my sun, turn into icy tears (Grinning to the world, you spoke my line on your knees)_

"These lines in parentheses...are the evil girl's words?" Sakura was stunned. The evil girl was there when the 'Queen' was punished? She had to see her own twin get _killed_!? What would her reactions be then? Would she feel regretful? Would she cry? Or would she smile, because her twin's dying in her place? What would she do?

_O my Queen, you have me as your faithful servant alone_   
_We were twins, torn apart when our fates should have shone_   
_Somehow in our next life, if we ever meet again_   
_Let us play together once more, and be the best of friends_

_TBC_

The poem had ended, but Sakura didn't put down the newspaper. She sat frozen in her chair, eyes staring blankly at her lap.

"Sakura? Sakura dear?" Mebuki called hesitantly, shaking her daughter's shoulders lightly. Getting no response, she glanced at her husband for help.

Kizashi moved towards Sakura and snapped his fingers, then he whispered, "Sasuke-kun is here to see you!"

Still, no response.

"Sakamoto-sensei is here to give you an autograph!"

Nope. No response.

In the corner of his eyes, Kizashi saw the foreign name on the page that his daughter was tightly gripping, and decided to try it out.

"Nakamura Tenzoi is here!"

In an instant, Sakura snapped her head up with a furious look adorning her features.

"He's here? That bastard is here!?" She cried in a mix of surprise and anger. "He dared to show his face after what he had done!?"

"What? Did he do something to you?!" Kizashi exclaimed. Anyone who dared to harm his daughter deserves a death penalty! "Don't worry! Papa will help you get revenge!"

"Papa..." Sakura shook her head. _He didn't harm her?_ Then she nodded. _Or did he?_

"He...he..." Tears began rolling down her cheeks uncontrollably. "H-how could he kill him? He was s-so loyal and kind and loving; yet, he made him d-die! Die in place of that deserving, evil little bitch!"

"Honey..."

"Mama..." Sakura turned to Mebuki. "Why? Why does he have to die?"

They both couldn't answer her question.

Sakura stood up suddenly and turned toward the door.

"Sakura, where are you going?"

"I'm going to Konoha Publisher!" She said as she put on her shoes. "I still have time before the team meeting. I'm going to find that Nakamura bastard and question him face to face!"

"What about your breakfast?" Mebuki eyed the untouched toast.

"No time to eat!"

The door slammed shut.

Her parents stared at each other questioningly. Then, dismissing Sakura's behavior as normal puberty behavior, they went back to their normal routine.

Kizashi picked up the newspaper Sakura had dropped and began reading the poem.

That day, Nakamura Tenzoi had gained two new fans.

Unlike the first poem, this poem had gained Nakamura Tenzoi more fans than the day before.

For example...

In a certain household, a young girl was seen yelling at her older brother.

"Look at you! And look at him! His younger sister made him kill the girl he loved! And he did just that! And now when she's gonna be punished, he stood in her place and died for her! He loved her _that_ much and did his older brother's duty _that_ well! And now look at you!" Aka screamed, picking a ripped dress. "I don't need you to love me as much as to die for me, but the least you could do is listen to me and stop ruining my stuff! Now what am I supposed to wear when my date is arriving in less than five minutes!?"

Her older brother bit his lips and argued. "And I already said I'm sorry! Besides, it wasn't completely my fault! You shouldn't have left your _oh so precious_ dress on the sofa where you _know_ I usually sit!"

"Fine! I accept your apology! But now what!? My dress is ruined! My date is ruined! My day is ruined! My LIFE is ruined! And it's all because of you!" Aka screamed frantically. "Why can't you be more like him!?" She threw two cut-out scraps of newspaper at Aoi and bolted out of the room in tears.

"Hmph. What's the big deal. It's just a dress. She has a full wardrobe of them." Aoi picked up the scraps and scoffed. "You said he's better than me. Pff. Let's see it then."

Ten minutes later, a very emotional Aoi laid down the poems. He looked up, forcing the tears to flow back into his eyes.

"You're right. Comparing to him, I suck." He stared at the author name, a relieved smile creeping onto his face. "Thank you, Nakamura Tenzoi, for showing me how bad I am as an older brother. Becoming your fan is the least I can do in return for your help."

Ever since that day, Aoi began treating his younger sister with more care and love.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This story is also posted on fanfiction.net in case you haven't yet realized. I always post the new chapters there first.


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